Wry & Dry


Last words...

"Put a ban on it, that’s how you solve the problem, and then let’s deal with the issues here."

-  Senator Pauline Hanson, yesterday, in response to the London terrorist attack.

...cogently arguing for a ban on, err, something.  W&D isn't quite sure of the logic in Senator Hanson's comments.  Not for the first time, he hastens to add.  

First Samuel client events calendar



Charity Event

Eat Street

This is Melbourne's most amazing food and wine fest.  All the proceeds of the event go to a charity.

Sofitel, Collins Street.

Invitations upcoming.


Art Series

NGV Winter Exhibition - First Samuel Private Viewing

Van Gogh and the Seasons

This will be a cocktail party followed by a private viewing.  Strictly clients only. 

(We are not sure if Van Gogh's 'Wheat Field with Cypress' - above - will be exhibited)

NGV, St Kilda Road.

Invitations upcoming.


Education Series

Annual Forum

This is our annual 'food for the brain' event.  Guest speaker to be confirmed.

Leonda, Hawthorn

Invitations upcoming.

Some lightly salted absurdities from all over...

At the extreme left-hand of the bell curve

Guess the outcome

Philip John Smith is serving a life sentence in prison in New Zealand.  He was convicted and imprisoned in 1996 for murdering the father of a boy he had previously sexually abused.  He also has a string of other convictions, including extortion, aggravated robbery and sexual offences.

But Smith's hairpiece was taken away when authorities recaptured him after he fled the country, using the toupee as part of a disguise.  

Did Smith:

a.  Accept the fact that he was bald, and in prison, who would care anyway;

b.  Call Ashley & Martin and arrange for new hair treatment;

c.  Extend the hairless look, and arrange to have an all-over body-wax; or 

d.  Lawyer-up.

Close, but no cigar.  The correct answer is d.  Smith sued and won a court battle to wear a toupee in prison, by arguing that it was within his human rights.   But he argued that his toupee was an "artwork" essential to his self-esteem.  High Court judge in Auckland ruled that his "fundamental right to freedom of expression was ignored".


W&D is wondering who paid for the court proceedings?

Can't possibly be true

The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office in January granted IBM's application for a patent on "out-of-office" e-mail message software after the company finally convinced examiners that its patent had enough software tweaks on it to qualify.

The application was made in 2010.

(Ars Technica)

Government in action

Illinois, USA has problems: a $130 billion unfunded-pension crisis, 19 months without a budget, the lowest credit rating in the country, highest property taxes in the country and the highest murder rate (in Chicago).

However, at least the state House of Representatives is not standing by idly. In February, it moved to designate October 2017 as Zombie Preparedness Month (basically, adding "zombie invasion" to the list of mobilizations for any natural disaster and urging residents to stockpile food and supplies for up to 72 hours).

(Wall Street Journal)

This is true.  Clearly, if you prepare for zombies, you’ll be ready for anything.

Have a wry and dry weekend