Wry & Dry

Miscellany

Last words...

Neil Mitchell (radio announcer):  "You'll accept them."

William Shorten: "Yes."

Neil Mitchell: "Even if they reduce Sunday penalty rates."

William Shorten: "Well, I'd accept the independent tribunal."

Excerpt from a radio show in 2016, (before the election), concerning the Fair Work Commission's review of Sunday penalty rates.

First Samuel client events calendar

Date 
Event
Description
Venue

Tue-9-May-17

Charity Event

Eat Street

This is Melbourne's most amazing food and wine fest.  All the proceeds of the event go to a charity.

Sofitel, Collins Street.

Invitations upcoming.

Tue-30-May-17

Art Series

NGV Winter Exhibition - First Samuel Private Viewing

Van Gogh and the Seasons

This will be a cocktail party followed by a private viewing.  Strictly clients only. 

(We are not sure if Van Gogh's 'Wheat Field with Cypress' - above - will be exhibited)

NGV, St Kilda Road.

Invitations upcoming.

?-August-17

Education Series

Annual Forum

This is our annual 'food for the brain' event.  Guest speaker to be confirmed.

Leonda, Hawthorn

Invitations upcoming.

Some lightly salted absurdities from all over...

At the extreme left-hand of the bell curve

The pre-game injury report for football's December 31st Citrus Bowl (an American football game between southern universities) included two University of Louisville linebackers, Henry Famurewa and James Hearns, who were out of action.

Nothing wrong with that.  Except the cause of the injuries was 'gunshot wounds.'

(Las Vegas Sun)   

Sick leave...

Iraqi forces taking over an ISIS base in Mosul in January reported finding papers from at least 14 Islamic State "fighters" who had tried to claim 'sick leave', asking commanders to please excuse them from real combat (and martyrdom).

One (a Belgian man) actually brought a note from a doctor back home attesting to his "back pain." Five of the 14 were initiated by volunteers from France, a country that endures a perhaps-undeserved national reputation for battle-avoidance.

(Washington Post)

Unclear on the concept I

Prominent Tallahassee, Florida pastor O. Jermaine Simmons, a community leader who ministers to the homeless and downtrodden, was rescued by police on January 17th, naked and hiding behind a fence after making a run for it when the husband of his mistress found the two in bed.

The husband, screaming, "I'm gonna kill him," ran for his handgun, and the mistress summoned police.

(Tallahassee Democrat)

Unclear on the concept II

Catholic priest Don Andrea Contin, 48, of Padua, Italy, was accused by three women in December of having as many as 30 different lovers over the years, organizing orgies on church property, visiting a swingers resort in France several times, making pornographic home videos of his trysts, and always carrying a briefcase full of vibrators, sex toys, and bondage equipment.

Contin has not yet been charged with a crime but, said a Catholic official, is 'finished' as a priest. 

(The Independent)

Bonus: The boxes for his home videos were labeled by the names of Popes. 

Have a wry and dry weekend

Anthony